I haven't been on the earth long, (24yrs, 11months, and 4days to be exact) but I have had my share of learning experiences. I've made MAJOR mistakes. I've made minor mistakes. I've hurt people. I've been hurt. I've made decisions that weren't well thought out. and I've over analyzed plenty of situations as well. I've cut people out of my life far too soon. And I've kept some people around for a lot longer than they needed to be. So you get the point.....for as much as I've accomplished in my life, I've also messed up quite a few times.
But one thing I pride myself on is that in every major (& most of the minor) situations in my life, I have learned from EVERYTHING! If i get burned on a stove once, you better believe, it won't happen again. Now, some lessons, I'm not gonna lie, they're tough ones, & it might take two or three times before I get it...but you better believe, by the end...I GOT IT!
So it amazes me when some people say that if they could do things over again, they'd change A,B, or C. I was thinking about it tonight....what if I were given that option? What things in my life would I change? And i can honestly say with conviction....I wouldn't change a thing. For example: in relationships, one of the FIRST things ppl say to their now-ex when going through the break-up is "I wish I had never met you..." Sure, it's easy to say that when you're coming from a place of hurt, but when your feelings aren't so raw & you sit and think about it, there was a lesson to be learned in this failed relationship. You could be (and SHOULD BE) introspective & analyze what YOU did wrong & use that to avoid making those same mistakes in your future relationships. And you could also think about what the other party did that may have contributed to the break-up so you know for the future what you can tolerate & what you can't. But without having met that person & going through that situation with them....you might not have learned that lesson. OR you may have eventually learned this lesson but perhaps through a more painful & completely unnecessary experience.
My point is this. Use every situation no matter how big or how small as a learning experience and as an opportunity to improve your life or that of someone around you. It could be lessons you learned in a relationship (don't have sex without condoms, speak your mind honestly from the beginning about what your expectations are, don't fart under the covers without warning, etc, etc) OR it could be a simple lesson (double check in the mirror before leaving the ladies room to make sure your shirt isn't tucked into your panties, check your pants pockets carefully before laundry to make sure your bank card isn't in there... ) Either way, never regret anything in your life. Never regret meeting a certain person. Never regret the way you handled a certain situation.
NEVER REGRET! There is always a lesson to be learned.
the random musings of a funny, hopeless romantic, mother of 1, Christian fat girl, trying to lose weight....
Scroll to the bottom to find past blogs & some of my fave sites :)
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
God knew I needed a reminder....
A few years ago I hit a really rough patch. Was trying to heal mentally, spiritually, & emotionally from a miscarriage. Was having all sorts of relationship issues (love, family, & friends), an identity crisis, major anger at God about a lot of things and on top of that, people were expecting me to make plans about what I wanted to do post college. So yeah there was a lot going on in my life. But as a future social worker I realize the necessity of good mental health, so even though I wanted to shut down (even more than i already had), I sought therapy. My counselor at the time definitely helped me through a lot & gave me a lot of tools that I could use for the rest of my life when dealing with things. Well one of the tools she was a huge fan of was little "reminders". (i don't really know what it was called). But it's like affirmations & things that you want to constantly remind yourself of, you kinda write it on a post it or index card & put it somewhere visible that you'll come into contact with on a daily basis.
Well last night I was cleaning my room (i know, finally) & tucked inside an old envelope somewhere I found one of my "reminders" that I wrote to myself. I don't know when I wrote it, & I don't remember exactly what was going on in my life. But it was in all my Salisbury stuff so it had to have been written at least 2-3 years ago. I was completely blown away when I read it because it can DEFINITELY be applied to my life RIGHT NOW!!! It's so funny because God always shows up when you need Him. At times I feel completely at my wits end & He'll show up in some kinda way that will remind me...He's got this :)
Anyway, this is what I found.....
*drops mic*
Well last night I was cleaning my room (i know, finally) & tucked inside an old envelope somewhere I found one of my "reminders" that I wrote to myself. I don't know when I wrote it, & I don't remember exactly what was going on in my life. But it was in all my Salisbury stuff so it had to have been written at least 2-3 years ago. I was completely blown away when I read it because it can DEFINITELY be applied to my life RIGHT NOW!!! It's so funny because God always shows up when you need Him. At times I feel completely at my wits end & He'll show up in some kinda way that will remind me...He's got this :)
Anyway, this is what I found.....
"Monique,
It's okay to admit that you're hurting. It doesn't make you any less strong. It's time for you to get your life under control again. The enemy is just trying to use this situation against you because he knows your desire to get closer to God....don't give him that power!!! God loves you. Your family & friends love you. You are fearfully & wonderfully made and God has invested something so wonderful in you. ...his spirit. Stay positive, steadfast & unmoveable. This is only a test and you are going to pass it!!! But above all things...remember the most imoprtant thing.....FORGIVE YOURSELF.
I love you,
-Self"
*drops mic*
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
One year.....
One February 12, 2011 it will be one year since I began my weight loss journey. And I feel like at a year later...I have to start ALL OVER AGAIN! Do you remember being a kid in school & leaving to go on summer vacation? Then when school starts again, your new teacher says "I'm just going to give you a little quiz to see what you remember from your last school year"....Well I'm fresh from vacation & I'm currently sitting at my desk staring at a blank sheet of paper. It seems like EVERYTHING I researched and taught myself in the last year about eating healthy, proper snacks, measuring my food, being active, delayed gratification & self-sacrifice has gone straight out the window.
I started the journey @ 346. I reached my lowest weight (on the journey, not of my life) around the end of Nov/Early Dec (285)....now I'm at 294. Yup I gained 10lbs. NOOO BUENO!!!!!! I made a vow to myself that I would never reach 300lbs again & if I seriously don't get a handle on my life ASAP...I'm gonna be there again. Like I mentioned in my last post, I hit a rough patch & started comfort eating again. Soooo i def gotta start journaling or reading leisure books or raising pet guinea pigs or something to distract myself from life/relieve stress. Anything but burgers, chicken, & pizza.....
People have told me often that I was a motivation to them & blah blah blah, well it ain't all roses. This weight loss stuff is TOUGH! (well when you decide to do it the natural way). And I'm a shining example right now of how easy it is to get off track & fall back into old and familiar habits. I did good for 10months or so...but I had a relapse. So just like any "addict" or someone struggling to regain control over their life...you take each new day as a chance to start over. Make better decisions than yesterday. Not beating myself up at all about it, just sometimes when you put things out into the atmosphere it makes you accountable. There's no doubt that I'll reach my goal weight....trust me. The only question is WHEN! lol. But yeah i'mma def get there :)
Wanna know something sad/ironic/funny....I'm typing this post as I'm eating a burger & watching The Biggest Loser -________- #DoBetterMonique.....
I started the journey @ 346. I reached my lowest weight (on the journey, not of my life) around the end of Nov/Early Dec (285)....now I'm at 294. Yup I gained 10lbs. NOOO BUENO!!!!!! I made a vow to myself that I would never reach 300lbs again & if I seriously don't get a handle on my life ASAP...I'm gonna be there again. Like I mentioned in my last post, I hit a rough patch & started comfort eating again. Soooo i def gotta start journaling or reading leisure books or raising pet guinea pigs or something to distract myself from life/relieve stress. Anything but burgers, chicken, & pizza.....
People have told me often that I was a motivation to them & blah blah blah, well it ain't all roses. This weight loss stuff is TOUGH! (well when you decide to do it the natural way). And I'm a shining example right now of how easy it is to get off track & fall back into old and familiar habits. I did good for 10months or so...but I had a relapse. So just like any "addict" or someone struggling to regain control over their life...you take each new day as a chance to start over. Make better decisions than yesterday. Not beating myself up at all about it, just sometimes when you put things out into the atmosphere it makes you accountable. There's no doubt that I'll reach my goal weight....trust me. The only question is WHEN! lol. But yeah i'mma def get there :)
Wanna know something sad/ironic/funny....I'm typing this post as I'm eating a burger & watching The Biggest Loser -________- #DoBetterMonique.....
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