Your Latter will be greater....

Stumbled across this blog posting. I liked it. Hope you all do too.

Job 8:7... Your Latter Will Be Greater

I'm watching Bill Winston's "Believer's Walk Of Faith" broadcast today, and Pastor Winston brought up Job 8:7.

Job 8:7 (NIV) says: Your beginnings will seem humble,
so prosperous will your future be.

Job 8:7 (KJV) says: Though thy beginning was small, yet thy latter end should greatly increase.

This brief, yet powerful scripture says to me exactly some of the things that we are going. Right now, we are in pretty small or humble situations, but when we come out on the other end, and we maintain our faithfulness, we will receive our blessings.

Satan wants us to look at our situations as we see them NOW... he wants us to get dragged down by things that we haven't accomplished yet, or things that we need to work on but are currently lacking the resources to do, relationships that aren't panning out the way we want them to, or what have you. When we start paying attention to things like that, and that depresses us, that's a distraction. Focusing on the negative things like that distracts us from the blessings that God has already given us, the blessings that he continues to give us, and the blessings yet to come.

Remember, in His Word, God has promised never to leave us, nor forsake us. He has also sent the Holy Spirit as The Comforter, and he even has angels on stand-by, waiting to minister to our needs in the supernatural realm.

We know all of the things that Job has gone through, and we saw that at the end result, Job was blessed with much more than he originally had (and he was already prosperous before God allowed the devil to test him). Job questioned God, but never doubted or cursed him. In the end, Job continued to thank God and praise him. I believe that this is how we are to be. We may not understand why we are going through something, but we should understand that no matter what it is, the Scripture tells us that He will never give us more than we can bear. I also believe that the greater our tests are now, the greater our rewards will be at the end.

Just as Jesus spoke about in the parable of the talents, we want Jesus to say to us "Well done, good and faithful servant." Part of doing that is to continue to work with what God has already blessed us with. When we do this, we will be like those servants... the master gave them a little, and they bore fruit in their works, and the master was pleased and he felt that they were ready for more.

And when things begin to look like they're going to go sideways, this is where our faith kicks in. Using myself for an example... right now, I feel like I'm underpaid, based on my education and background. But my faith tells me that this is just like the parable of the talents... I'm doing well with a job that doesn't pay what I need to REALLY get things done on a personal level... and soon, I WILL be in a position to really take care of business. And I'm sure that you can find similar examples in your own lives.

The bottom line is that regardless of how things look right now (especially if they are looking bleak, sad, disappointing, or what have you), your real blessing is directly in front of you. You may not be able to see it in the natural realm, but if you smash the smoke and mirrors that the enemy uses to distract you, you will be able to see it in the spiritual realm. And if there's one more thing I can say, it's something that my pastor has shared with us. If you are in expectation of a blessing, start thanking God for it now. Before you get it, thank God for it. Regardless of what it is. When you do that, then you will pay more attention to how God is moving through your life, and focus less on the obstacles and roadblocks the enemy is trying to put in your path. And then, think about the testimony that you will have once the blessings start pouring down for you. The things that you are going through will be a great way to witness to someone else who is going through same or similar circumstances

Source: ORIGINAL ARTICLE

Keep ya mouth shut sometimes.....

Source: Clutch Magazine

Ain’t None of Your Friend’s Business

MONDAY OCT 11, 2010 – BY BENE VIERA

It is through the bonds of sisterhood that we develop an unbreakable kinship, one so strong that we trust our girlfriends with our lives. The deepest of secrets are shared, tears of joy and pain are cried on shoulders, laughter is abundant, and we toast to each other’s successes.

Naturally we tend to divulge the intricate details of our lives to those closest to us. That urge doesn’t change when we find ourselves in romantic relationships. In the beginning everything is all good. It’s new, fresh, and electrifying. Whenever you catch up with the bestie, you share nothing but the positive highlights of your new beau. But as the relationship continues to blossom, you realize your man is not a knight in shining armor, but just a great man with flaws like everyone else. So when problems arise you dial up your girl for a heart-to-heart.

Although there is absolutely nothing wrong with venting—everyone needs someone who just listens sometimes—the biggest mistake women make in their relationships is disclosing all of their relationship business to their friends.

When in a relationship, we often seek the advice or opinions of others because they can offer a viewpoint from outside looking inward. Depending on how the dice rolls, this could be beneficial, harmful, or somewhere in between. But I would warn women to tread lightly when getting in the habit of sharing all the trials and tribulations of their relationship with the girls.

We tend to inadvertently share more of the bad than the good. You won’t necessarily tell your friends every time your man does something romantic. But after you’ve had a blow-out argument, it is not unlikely that you want to let off steam by talking to one of your girls about it. Whether or not you want her to just listen, or be your peanut gallery and chime in, chances are she will have something to say. Whether it is in favor of team him or team you, she’s unlikely to forget this in the future when similar situations occur.

You never want to put yourself in a predicament where you lose a good friend because you’ve unfairly involved her in your relationship woes. You also wouldn’t want your friend’s opinions of how you should handle a situation affect how you react or treat your significant other.

Subconsciously, people sometimes project their own issues on others. You could just be looking for a friendly ear while she is frustrated with her own life. You tell her your man raised his voice for the first time in an argument and she responds, “I knew he wasn’t about nothing. You need to leave that fool!” Now you’re standing there with the boo boo face because your best friend just told you to leave your man. Yeah, no thanks.

Of course this not a one-size-fits-all model for all women. Some girlfriends are the masters of viewing a situation objectively, offering a listening ear and not weighing in either way. But the chances of this are . . .

There should be boundaries between your relationship and your friendships when it comes to letting folks in on your business. Your relationship is between you and your man. And, really, no third party is needed.

Trust in God......

Sometimes the things we want aren't necessarily the best things for us. That’s why sometimes we “curse” God wondering why isn’t he giving us the things that we have asked for? Is he punishing me for something by denying me of this? It's frustrating & a bit discouraging.

But a part of being a believer/follower of Christ is knowing that God has an ultimate plan for us & He knows what's in our best interest (For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ~Jer 29:11) & all He asks is that we trust in Him. The word says that all we need is faith the size of a mustard seed. That's a very small amount (see below picture) although at times (well be honest, most times) we don't understand what it is that He's doing for us, through us, or with us but deep down we HAVE to know that in the end...if you've trusted God with ur whole heart & took heed to His word, that it all worked out just the way it was supposed to.

Perhaps in time you'll have a "light bulb" moment and say "oh hey God, now I get why u didn't let me have that thing that I THOUGHT I wanted when I wanted it! Thanks!" (bcuz let's be real, if you put it into perspective, half of the things we keep asking God for, we don't really want anyway or know darn well we aren't supposed to have it)...But sometimes that moment of enlightenment never happens (it's His plan it's not necessarily for us to always understand). Just take solace in the fact that there is someone out there that loves you beyond measure, that cares so much about you they risk being cursed at & turned away from, just because they want the best things in life for you.

Through it all, I just encourage you to seek His face & ask Him to help you figure out what lesson it was that He wanted you to learn…and move forward. I wrote this blog to encourage myself…but I figured I’d share because It may encourage someone else.

♥



that's all the faith He's asking you to have in him...small request right?



Couldn't have said it better myself....

((I didn't write this...but I could have!))

No Fat Chicks: Navigating the dating world as a Fat girl --Tasha Fierce

Thick, curvy, voluptuous—nah. I’m a proud fat Black chick with no hangups about my size, and I have the nerve to expect a romantic interest to be comfortable with it. I learned a long time ago that I needed to love myself before anyone else was going to love me, so I’m perfectly happy being on my own if I can’t find a partner who accepts me as I am. But my past experience has borne out that it’s not impossible for a fat chick to get a date. Being sexy and fat isn’t as hard as some people would have you believe.

That said, society doesn’t exactly make it easy on fat women to develop healthy self-esteem. Even within the Black community, where fat is supposedly accepted so much more readily than in other cultures, fat women experience discrimination, disgust and ridicule. Fat might be more acceptable, but you have to be a certain kind of fat—padding in all the “right” places and none where it’s not desirable. Fat women with bodies that don’t fit the bill are either desexualized and Mammy-fied, or their sexuality is seen as a joke—take for example, Eddie Murphy’s Rasputia in “Norbit.”  Black men dressing in fat woman drag and overpowering skinny men with their animalistic desire gets a lot of laughs because society has conditioned us to see fat female sexuality as something to be laughed at or disgusted by.

Where dating is concerned, there’s another stereotype regarding fat women to contend with that runs rampant in the minds of men in particular—the mythological fat chick with low self-esteem who will let any brother still breathing have a taste. While there are, of course, fat women out there with low self-esteem, most of the fat chicks I know aren’t down to settle for just anyone. This stereotype tends to be applied most often if you’ve got boobs and a booty. You might be carrying that spare tire, but that won’t stop men from hitting it and quitting it the morning after. Just don’t tell their boys.

The images we’re bombarded with via sources such as fashion magazines, hip hop videos, “reality” TV, and other outlets of mainstream media, reinforce the dominant cultural paradigm which states that only thin bodies can be desirable. Fat women are taught that they are less-than and unworthy of love or sexual pleasure. Being Black women, we already are made to believe that we’re not as attractive or desirable as our White counterparts—add fat to the mix and you’ve got a cocktail deadly to our self-esteem. Not to mention the constant barrage of news stories telling us we’re doomed to be single. If thin Black women aren’t getting any love, what are the chances for us fat Black chicks?

It’s often said that being a Black woman means you have to work twice as hard as the next White woman to be seen as equal. That goes doubly for fat Black women in the dating game. Everything has to be on point—hair bangin’, makeup perfectly applied, style impeccable—just to be noticed. Is it fair? Of course not. Is it real? Unfortunately, yes. But although appearance may be the key to get you in the door, even more important for your well-being and success at finding a quality partner is your internal game. It may be cliché, but confidence in yourself is your best asset. All you’re going to attract are scrubs if you don’t have a self-assured aura—and, yes, that means some nights you might be alone. It’s better to not have a date than to end up with some fool who doesn’t appreciate your value. You have to realize that you deserve a partner who isn’t out to take advantage of you or isn’t ashamed to be seen with you in the daylight. Don’t end up on someone’s “booty call” list.

If loving your body as it is is new to you, I suggest you get familiar with some voluptuous Black women who are famously comfortable in their own skin–and offering their tips on how to feel the same. I’m talking our lady Afrobella, the amazing Marie Denee of The Curvy Fashionista, everyone’s favorite MTV TJ Gabi Gregg, the forever fashion-forward Xtina from Musings of a Fatshionista, and any of the other gorgeous Black “fatshion” bloggers out there repping for the stylish plus-size chicks. Seeing these women work it just might give you the self-confidence to say no to the next zero who’s trying to hook up for a one-nighter. Unless, of course, you feel like a one-nighter, to which I say go get yours–as long as you’re doing it because you’re feeling sexually liberated and not downtrodden and lonely. Not judging, just saying.

Despite all of the obstacles fat Black women face while trying to find a potential partner, it’s not all bad. There are good prospects out there, you just need to be patient, refuse to suffer fools gladly, and practice self-love. Trust that if you send positive energy out there, you’ll get it in return. You might have to whack a few weeds down, but it’ll be worth it when you find that person who’s going to make you feel like the gorgeous fat Black woman you are. Belly, hips, thighs and all.

Source: http://clutchmagonline.com/lifeculture/feature/no-fat-chicks-navigating-the-dating-world-as-a-fat-girl/

sorry i've been slacking.....

Apologies for the lack of updates....been trying to figure some things out in my life & it's made it difficult to write. So for the few ppl who actually read this thing...I guess these are my updates?

The Journey:
I officially weigh 299lbs! (you should see the huge paragraph that I just deleted that was downplaying my loss but i erased it) Ummm i'm kicking butt! I've lost 47lbs since February (could it be better, possibly, but is it a great accomplishment HECK YES!) First time that i've been in the 200's since I was @ least 17. & i'm definitely wearing clothes sizes that I haven't seen in forever! I honestly can't tell u the last time i could fit into a 26 pant (which I was informed by my boss are now too baggy so i'm sure i'm in @ least a 22/24 now). & I bought a coat maybe 2yrs ago...it was a 4x. i jst bought a coat last week that was a 2x! WOW. Even with buying smaller clothes & ppl telling me daily how "good" I look....I still don't see it tho lol. (mental distortion)

Anyway, 30% of my goal met so far. Not too shabby if I say so myself....do i still sometimes wish i had the strength to go to the doctors & pray for them to give me lapband/gastric bypass so that I can reach my goal quicker? ALMOST EVERY DAY!!!! But i have to try this my way first...it's teaching me a lot. Self control. Self Sacrifice. Patience. Delayed gratification....like i mentioned in previous blogs...things that I've never been too good with. So that's definitely a plus on the journey. oh & I wanted to reach 50lbs lost by 12/12/10...so i'm actually AHEAD of where I thought I was gonna be...sooo the journey continues (thanks for the support all).

School:
still not sure when/if I wanna go back. But I have to do something, so I think i'll sign up for spring semester part time & decide if social work is what I wanna do. If not...i'll go back to the drawing board but at least I would have been doing SOMETHING in the meantime. & they'll put my student loans on hold for a little too so that's a MAJOR plus! Still thinking that I may end up in the school system somehow. Everyone has always told me how i'd be a great teacher & kids love me for some reason. Starting to realize it now as I spend more time with my best friend & his kids. I actually enjoy helping them with their homework & things like that. So who knows...but your 20's are supposed to be a time of exploration right? i'm halfway thru them (almost) & haven't explored...so i gotta get on the ball!

Personal Goals:
Have a couple of other little personal goals that i don't wanna share. But just know, making progress on them as well. :)

Spiritually:
Friday night...I thought I was gonna die. I've been going through a lot of emotions & thoughts lately & there was a conversation that was had that really put a lot of things into perspective & i felt like it was too much to handle. It was about 3:30am and all i could do was cry. I cried out to God like I hadn't in a long time. My chest was hurting & I was just praying for God to take me. I wanted the pain to stop. the hurt. frustrations. anger. insecurities. it was too much to think about. i didn't wanna deal with it. I just wanted to die. Death is easier than to confront issues. I was actually afraid to go to sleep bcuz i didn't know if God was gonna answer my prayer that nite. Obviously, he didn't. I woke up yesterday, went to see my friend in the hospital (welcome to the world baby Maci♥). & spent the rest of the afternoon/evening in thought. Something had to give. I never wanted to get to a place where I was PRAYING to die! WTHeck!? I knew what I had to do....God was calling me back. He's been calling for a while but I still was attempting to ignore it. But that nite that I had was a wake up call. I needed him. I've been searching for something to fill a void for a long time & i know where I belong.

So I went to church this am. (of my own free will lol). I went a couple of weeks ago to a diff church, but wasn't rlly open, so I didn't really get much out of it. But today, I woke up with a spirit of expectation. God jst HAD to work something out. It was a matter of life & death. He just HAD TO! I received what it was I was looking for. I found a small amount of peace today, for the first time in a while. At the end of the service, the pastor was opening the altar for ppl to accept Christ or come back home. I couldn't move. I knew that I needed to go up there, but there was still something holding me back. But then my cousin & aunt looked @ me & asked if I was alright & suddently whatever was sitting in my lap keeping me from walking those few feet to the front of the room were lifted. & I came back home....

I know that there's a lot that God has to still work out in me. But i'm not running anymore. I've gone back home. & my walk to rebuild my relationship with Christ as well as establish myself in a new church home, begins/continues...

Love & Relationships:
In the words of my BFF (in my head) India Arie, "it ain't happening the way I want it". But hey, everything in God's time. & maybe right now isn't the time to try to get into a relationship. I'm a broken person. & being with someone won't make me whole. Until I can absolutely with 1000% certainty look in the mirror & know that I love the person looking back at me. & I know how to make MYSELF happy....a relationship with someone else will never work. So for now, I need to take comfort in the love of my family & friends. My God. My goals. And just know that I'm not as alone as I feel.

Special shout out to my best friend....he knows how amazing he is. & I thank God for having him in my life.

....this is it for now. I'm tired of writing. & i'm hungry. lol. Later folks!